Book One: Final Post

As I sail off into the sunset, I'm posting an old favorite for the twelfth time. I'm going on hiatus now. My wedding day is one month from now, and yes, we're getting married the day after Christmas. Yes, I know it's nuts, but it wasn't my idea.

It is my idea to take a month off from this blog before my wedding out of respect for my fiancée, and not return to this blog for at least a month after the wedding out of respect for my new wife. Then we'll see what happens.

Many of you emailed and commented many questions and comments to me about me and this blog, and I'll answer in my own way below the fold. It's quite long, so read it only if you really want to. In any case, see you in two months! As for today:

I want to fuck Natalie Portman again today.



First, I want to thank everyone for actually paying attention to my perverted private thoughts. I'm always amazed when I look at the Stats page and see how many people around the world are aware of my erections! Pretty funny. But let me get to my answers to your questions. I'll just sum up the answers in my own way. Answers to all questions will be contained in here somewhere. Here goes.

"Am I sick?"

Let me first say I love women, grown women, adult women! But, I am clearly also into ephebophilia, the sexual attraction to those in late adolescence, older than 14 or 15, but still underage. I am somewhat into hebephilia as well, the attraction to younger yet post-pubescent girls. Some say I’m sick; I say no and fuck you. I find it very amusing that there seems to be so much anger and vitriol directed at grown men who admit they have a physical attraction to teenagers. It is not pedophilia! I'm quite sure this anger comes from guys who have suppressed these desires in themselves for so long that they just lash out in rage rather than admit it to themselves. Fucking hypocrites!

What I am NOT is a pedophile. So what's the difference between ephebophilia and pedophilia? One word: boobs. Pedophilia is specifically the primary or exclusive sexual interest in PREPUBESCENT children, NOT teenagers! That's it! Breasts, along with pussy hair, periods, curves and height make a girl biologically an adult, but not legally, morally, or ethically. If a girl has any combo of the above, I allow myself to be attracted to her. I'm not a hypocrite. I am a heterosexual man who can admit to the temptation of younger women and girls.

Let me also say that I have never touched a young girl in any way, never mind having sex with one. I've never approached a young girl, and I don't go to chat rooms to try to lure and pick up young girls. I simply admit I like to look! I think any grown man who can look at Miley Cyrus (last year), or Dakota Fanning, or AnnaSophia Robb, or Emma Watson (a few years ago), or Victoria Justice, or take your pick, and says he’s not attracted is full of shit or gay. I think even younger ones like Chloë Moretz, Bella Thorne, Ariel Winter, and others can often be looked at and thought about by adult men without any guilt. Every generation has had ones like these. Britney Spears back in the 90s, Natalie Portman when she was younger, Brooke Shields, and many, many more. Sexy is sexy! It’s in our genes to get it up for a tight round ass, perky breasts, and a cute smile.

However, they are still kids. Which is why I have never and will never make any attempt to have sex with any minor. Interestingly, when I do meet a young sexy girl of say 15, I’m usually immediately turned off by the way they talk and act. Like children. And with younger and younger girls showing physical maturity in this country, the more that will happen. So, don’t worry. Just because I can imagine fucking a tender, sweet, young thing doesn’t mean I ever will.

"Does my fiancée know about any of this?"

Yes and no. She knows all my perversions, and I know hers. She knows I like younger girls, but is secure in knowing I would never make any attempt to get one. She knows I have the hots for her friends, and for her cousins, and for her sisters, and I have suggested some outside adventures for us. I mentioned before that she agreed to let me fuck a friend of hers only if she could fuck two of mine. Sounds unfair, but that’s the deal. I’m quite certain it will never happen, but you never know. Her sisters and cousins are off limits, of course. She won’t even discuss it. Once, she claimed she had the hots for both of my brothers, which really sickened me, so I let it go. Even after the fact that I included them in my bday fantasies, it still doesn’t make the idea any less repulsive.

She does not know about this blog. She does not know I’ve included her and her sisters and cousins in my fantasies. She knows nothing about my fantasy interests in my own cousins and nieces, but that could possibly change soon. I’m not sure she ever will know, but you never know.

"What is this Top Ten List of mine?"

When we first got together, we often talked about celebs we had the hots for and we’d like to fuck if we got the chance. So we each made a list, and agreed that if either of us met any of these stars, and they were convinced to do so, we could have sex with them with each other’s permission. The sucky thing is Natalie Portman is not allowed to be on mine because I met her a few times while visiting my friend who went to Harvard with her. The fact I’ve already met her means it’s more likely (yeah, sure) that I could meet her again and have sex with her!

The List has had some changes over the years, I drop some older ones and add younger ones, or just lose interest in some. These are my Top Ten now, in alphabetical order. Some will be pretty obvious: Linda Cardellini, Sasha Cohen, Selena Gomez, Mila Kunis, Parminder Nagra, Hayden Panettiere, Anna Paquin, Emmy Rossum, Amber Tamblyn, and Emma Watson. I don't pay too much attention to who is on her list, but if you really want to know, I'll find out.

"Do I keep track of the women in whoIwanttofucktoday?"

Yes I have, and it’s pretty easy. I can’t imagine anyone is possibly interested, but this blog has had thousands of hits, so you never know. The top victims of my 373 individual shots of attention are:

Selena Gomez 16 Celebrity
Natalie Portman 12 Celebrity
Mila Kunis 8 Celebrity
Emma Watson 5 Celebrity
Hayden Panettiere 5 Celebrity
Miley Cyrus 5 Celebrity
Sasha Cohen 5 Athlete
Aria 4 Pornstar
Brittany X 4 Nonceleb, My niece
Sandra 4 Model

Everyone else has had three or fewer appearances. I was a little surprised Natalie wasn’t first, but then I did go a little crazy when Selena became legal. I even added her to my Top Ten dropping Rachel Bilson. I completely forgot about Pornstar Aria. What a hot one. And of course my niece Brittany made four appearances. She’ll never know that, of course! And who could ever ignore Sandra? Not me!

If anyone is interested, here are all the rest in descending and in alphabetical order:

Alexis X 3 Nonceleb, My niece
Anna Paquin 3 Celebrity
Bella Thorne 3 Celebrity
Billie Piper 3 Celebrity
Britney Spears 3 Celebrity
Ileana D'Cruz 3 Celebrity
Vanessa Hudgens 3 Celebrity
Adriana Lima 2 Model
Agam Rodberg 2 Model
Allison Stokke 2 Athlete
Amber Tamblyn 2 Celebrity
Anna Kournikova 2 Athlete
Anne Hathaway 2 Celebrity
Anya X 2 Nonceleb, My fiancée's sister
Brianna X 2 Nonceleb, My fiancée's sister
Brittany Marie Guzik 2 Model
Brittany X 2 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Brooke Shields 2 Celebrity
Carey Mulligan 2 Celebrity
Carmen Maria 2 Model
Dakota Fanning 2 Celebrity
Esti Ginzberg 2 Model
Heather X 2 Nonceleb, My cousin
Jackie X 2 Nonceleb, My cousin
Jamie Lynn Spears 2 Celebrity
Jane March 2 Celebrity
Jenny X 2 Nonceleb, My distant cousin
Jessica White 2 Celebrity
Karla Spice 2 Pornstar
Keira Knightley 2 Celebrity
Kelly X 2 Nonceleb, My friend's sister
Kim Yu-Na 2 Athlete
Kristin Kreuk 2 Celebrity
Lacey 2 Model
Lorraine Nicholson 2 Celebrity
Lucy Hale 2 Celebrity
Mary-Kate Olsen 2 Celebrity
Michelle Kwan 2 Athlete
Michelle Wie 2 Athlete
Milena 2 Pornstar
Miranda Kerr 2 Model
Nastia Liukin 2 Athlete
Nicole X 2 Nonceleb, My niece
Pamela Spice 2 Pornstar
Rachel X 2 Nonceleb, My fiancée's cousin
Sasaki Nozomi 2 Celebrity
Serena Williams 2 Athlete
Shawn Johnson 2 Athlete
Sunisa Kim 2 Celebrity
Tatyana Ali 2 Celebrity
Taylor X 2 Nonceleb, My fiancée's cousin
Victoria Justice 2 Celebrity
Aira Mihana 1 Model
Alexa Melo 1 Celebrity
Alexa Vega 1 Celebrity
Alia Shawkat 1 Celebrity
Alicia Sacramone 1 Athlete
Alicia Silverstone 1 Celebrity
Alina 1 Model
Alina Kabayeva 1 Athlete
Alisa 1 Pornstar
Alissa Czisny 1 Athlete
Alizée 1 Celebrity
Almudena Cid Tostado 1 Athlete
Alona Bondarenko 1 Athlete
Alyson Renae Michalka 1 Celebrity
Alyson Stoner 1 Celebrity
Amanda Bieber 1 Athlete
Amanda Joy Michalka 1 Celebrity
Amber Le Bon 1 Celebrity
Ana Ivanović 1 Athlete
Anastasia Myskina 1 Athlete
Anna Oonishi 1 Model
AnnaSophia Robb 1 Celebrity
Annie X 1 Nonceleb, My neighbor
Annie Yi 1 Model
April 1 Pornstar
Ariel 1 Pornstar
Ashely Tisdale 1 Celebrity
Ashlee Simpson 1 Celebrity
Ashley Greene 1 Celebrity
Ashley Harkleroad 1 Athlete
Ashley Olsen 1 Celebrity
Barbara Schett 1 Athlete
Bianca Collins 1 Celebrity
Biba Golic 1 Athlete
Bonnie Dennison 1 Celebrity
Brenda Song 1 Celebrity
Brie Larson 1 Celebrity
Caitlin Wachs 1 Celebrity
Callie X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's score
Carolina Salgado 1 Athlete
Caroline Wozniacki 1 Athlete
Chelsea Tallarico 1 Celebrity
Cherry Teen Model 1 Model
Cheryl Lynne 1 Model
Chloë Moretz 1 Celebrity
Christian Serratos 1 Celebrity
Christina Aguilera 1 Celebrity
Cinderella Girl 1 Model
Cindy Pornstar 1 Pornstar
Cindy Teen Model 1 Model
Dakota Blue Richards 1 Celebrity
Dani Thorne 1 Celebrity
Danica McKellar 1 Celebrity
Daniela Hantuchova 1 Athlete
Danielle X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's girlfriend
Danielle X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's score
Danni 1 Pornstar
Debby Ryan 1 Celebrity
Demi Lovato 1 Celebrity
Dominika Cibulková 1 Athlete
Dominique Moceanu 1 Athlete
Drew Barrymore 1 Celebrity
Elena Dementieva 1 Athlete
Elena Hight 1 Athlete
Elizabeth Jagger 1 Celebrity
Ellie X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Elly Tran Ha 1 Model
Emily Osment 1 Celebrity
Emma Roberts 1 Celebrity
Emma Stone 1 Celebrity
Emmy Rossum 1 Celebrity
Evan Rachel Wood 1 Celebrity
Felicity Fey 1 Pornstar
Freida Pinto 1 Celebrity
Gabriel Sabatini 1 Athlete
Gabriella Cilmi 1 Celebrity
Gianna Distenca 1 Celebrity
Grace Leer 1 Celebrity
Haley Ramm 1 Celebrity
Heather Mitts 1 Athlete
Hope Solo 1 Athlete
Hyoni Kang 1 Model
India Eisley 1 Celebrity
Irecel Manolo 1 Model
Jamie X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's girlfriend
Jamie X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's sister
Jazmin X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's score
Jeannie X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's sister
Jemma McKenzie-Brown 1 Celebrity
Jennie Finch 1 Athlete
Jennifer Connelly 1 Celebrity
Jenny 1 Pornstar
Jillian X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's score
Jin-hee Park 1 Celebrity
Jodelle Ferland 1 Celebrity
Jordan Pruitt 1 Celebrity
Jordyn Taylor 1 Celebrity
Julianna Rose Mauriello 1 Celebrity
Kaili Thorne 1 Celebrity
Kamilla 1 Pornstar
Karina Petroni 1 Athlete
Kasia 1 Pornstar
Katie Holmes 1 Celebrity
Katie Leung 1 Celebrity
Keisha Castle-Hughes 1 Celebrity
Keke Palmer 1 Celebrity
Kelly Monaco 1 Celebrity
Kendall Jenner 1 Celebrity
Keshia Chanté 1 Celebrity
Kiira Korpi 1 Athlete
Kim Ok-Bin 1 Celebrity
Kim Smith 1 Model
Kimmie 1 Pornstar
Kimmy 1 Pornstar
Kourtney X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Kristen Stewart 1 Celebrity
Kristin Furukawa 1 Athlete
Kristin Herrera 1 Celebrity
Krystal Meyer 1 Celebrity
Kyla Pratt 1 Celebrity
Laura 1 Pornstar
Laure Manaudou 1 Athlete
Lauren X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Laurie Teen Model 1 Model
Laurie X 1 Nonceleb, Neighbor on street
Leonela X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's score
Leryn Franco 1 Athlete
Lily Collins 1 Celebrity
Linda Cardellini 1 Celebrity
Lindsay Marie 1 Pornstar
Lindsey Jacobellis 1 Athlete
Lindsey Vonn 1 Athlete
Lolo Jones 1 Athlete
Lucy Sun 1 Pornstar
Madison X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Maggie X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Malese Jow 1 Celebrity
Maria Sharapova 1 Athlete
Marisa X 1 Nonceleb, Neighbor in pool
Meaghan Jette Martin 1 Celebrity
Melanie X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Michelle Trachtenberg 1 Celebrity
Miho Yoshioka 1 Model
Miko Sinz 1 Pornstar
Minerva X 1 Nonceleb, My friend's sister
Miranda Cosgrove 1 Celebrity
Missy Gibson 1 Athlete
Natalie Coughlin 1 Athlete
Natalie Glebova 1 Celebrity
Nene Fujimori 1 Pornstar
Nicole Gale Anderson 1 Celebrity
Nicole Vaidišová 1 Athlete
Norah Jones 1 Celebrity
Olga Poutchkova 1 Athlete
Olivia Hussey 1 Celebrity
Parminder Nagra 1 Celebrity
Paula Creamer 1 Athlete
Paula DeAnda 1 Celebrity
Peaches Geldof 1 Celebrity
Penélope Cruz 1 Celebrity
Phoebe Cates 1 Celebrity
Q'orianka Kilcher 1 Celebrity
Rachel Bilson 1 Celebrity
Saaya Irie 1 Model
Sabine Lisicki 1 Athlete
Saffron Le Bon 1 Celebrity
Samantha Droke 1 Celebrity
Sandy I 1 Pornstar
Sandy II 1 Pornstar
Saorise Ronan 1 Celebrity
Sara Paxton 1 Celebrity
Sarah Burke 1 Athlete
Scout Taylor-Compton 1 Celebrity
Seema X 1 Nonceleb, My friend
Shailene Woodley 1 Celebrity
Sharon X 1 Nonceleb, Neighbor in pool
Sherri Valerie Guzik 1 Model
Sorana Cîrstea 1 Athlete
Steffani Brass 1 Celebrity
Steffi Graf 1 Athlete
Stephanie Rice 1 Athlete
Stephanie X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Stormi Henley 1 Model
Summer Bishil 1 Celebrity
Summer Sanders 1 Athlete
Sylvia X 1 Nonceleb, My friend of friend
Talullah Le Bon 1 Celebrity
Tamannaah Bhatia 1 Celebrity
Tara Lipinski 1 Athlete
Taryne Mowatt 1 Athlete
Tawnee Stone 1 Pornstar
Taylor Momsen 1 Celebrity
Tonia Couch 1 Athlete
Tori X 1 Nonceleb, My fiancée's friend
Vojislava Lukic 1 Athlete
Willa Holland 1 Celebrity
Yamila Diaz-Rahi 1 Model
Yasmin Le Bon 1 Celebrity
Zoe Saldana 1 Celebrity
"This Girl" I 1 Unknown
"This Girl" II 1 Nonceleb, Girl in mall
"This Girl" III 1 Unknown
"This Girl" IV 1 Unknown
"This Girl" IX 1 Unknown
"This Girl" V 1 Unknown
"This Girl" VI 1 Unknown
"This Girl" VII 1 Nonceleb, Girl on street
"This Girl" VIII 1 Unknown
"This Girl" X 1 Unknown
"This Girl" XI 1 Nonceleb, Girl on beach I
"This Girl" XII 1 Nonceleb, Girl on beach II
"This Girl" XIII 1 Nonceleb, Neighbor at pool
"This Girl" XIV 1 Nonceleb, Girl on beach III
"This Hot Asian" I 1 Unknown
"This Hot Asian" II 1 Pornstar
"This Hot Black Woman" 1 Unknown

So that’s about it.

If you want to keep reading this blog, even though I won’t be making any entries for awhile, go ahead. Also, comment as much as you want. I’ll be checking in now and then.

Thanks again for reading!

See you in two months.